Tag Archives: humility

My dearest, darling little brother

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❤️ Darling Brother M.K.A ❤️

My dearest, darling little brother,

I know, without a doubt, sweet brother, that you are enjoying Heaven and that you are in high spirits over there, yet I still must ask: “How are you?”

You were are the baby of the family and I am the eldest among us three siblings. You left us much too soon. My heart aches. No words can give me comfort, and no one can help drive away the pain.

Sad to say, I simply took it all for granted. I thought that there would be many more days, more weeks, months and years for sibling shenanigans – in fact, even on the day you left us, I was waiting to see your smiling face, when later that evening, on your arrival home, I’d carry out the same daily ritual…..I’d quickly demand the ‘password’ before letting you in. Of course, you knew there was no password and that I’d promptly open the door for you. But that daily drama had to be done.

I dearly miss that. It feels as if a bit of my heart has been taken away.

I vividly remember…… The sun set that evening. I waited for you, bro. I so wanted to see your smiling face. But that was never to be. God had other plans. We must submit to His will. Yet still, I can’t help wondering, why? It hurts enormously.

Why? .. Why? Questions sail on my flowing tears, the mist fogs up my vision. Deeply distressed. Bewildered. Baffled. Yet I realise, I must bow to His will, I must!

You left without even saying “goodbye” … Each morning, after breakfast, you’d leave for office at 8.10am, promptly. That day, within an hour, I received the dreaded phone call. A stranger calling to tell me that you were are no more.

Shocked. Numb. I am dumbstruck. I am stunned, shattered by the effect of the words. I feel as if I’m having a bad dream nightmare, and, in desperation I try to wake up. But, the reality hits me, wickedly, in the face. It is all true. This is real. I walk in my room, aimlessly, waiting for the facts to sink in.

This was a phone call I thought I would never receive, and words I would never hear. Because, somehow, the silly me always thought I’d be the first one to go. After all, I am the eldest – the old one.

Even though you were are our baby, yet you always took care of my problems and, like a true super hero, invariably found solutions to all the difficult happenings in my life. You were there at all times for me. And, yes, even now, you are here beside me. I honestly believe that.

I can sense your presence. I talk to you as if you’re sitting right next to me…..and yes, you surely are. God has been kind. He let us have you for fifty-three years, how blessed we were are! Greatly honoured. It was is a privilege having you belong to our family. Thank You, God, immensely.

I feel enormously blessed because whenever I think of you, I can only remember the happy times. And He graced us with countless! All the laughter, the giggles, innocent guffaws, those secret exchanges of knowing smiles after creating a blooper, and those stifled sniggers, still echo cheerily in my ears. Many a time I catch myself grinning broadly when recalling some of our escapades. God bless.

You’d tell people that: “Whenever my big sister rings me and, in a particular tone of voice, says, ‘Hello, MKA, are you there?’, I know that she’s committed a boo-boo somewhere!”

Haha, that’s so true. For whenever I’d done something catastrophic or bungled up somewhere, you, my darling brother – my knight in shining armour – would come riding on your white horse and rescue me – the dainty, delicate damsel in distress! Sigh. You knew me very well. Sigh. I miss you so.

I am remembering a childhood incident that took place in Yorkshire, England. Mum had taken us three siblings to watch Walt Disney’s ‘The Sword in the Stone.’

It turned out that you, little bro (at the tender age of four and a half, if you please!) were smitten by Queen Guinevere. You wished to be Sir Lancelot, the top knight of King Arthur’s Knights of the Round Table. Oh crikey, and what a dashing knight you turned out to be!

After the film, that day, you spent ages in your room, flapping cardboard, flicking crayons and flipping papers. Eventually, when you emerged from your room, what sight do we behold? Or, rather, who do we see?

Sir Lancelot! Yes. Little bro, our knight in shining armour, all dressed up, carrying a cardboard sword and a cardboard shield, bearing a name that was oh-so proudly emblazoned on the cardboard weapon of mass destruction: ‘Slanslot.’ …………. Aww.

One day, years back, Daddy asked you, beloved brother, to write a composition……a task you weren’t pretty fond of then, yet you acceded to parent’s request.

And your Pulitzer Prize winning essay went thus….

‘One day ten crows sat on a wall. They all fell off the wall. Then there were ten dead crows.’

End of story. Period. ……oh, the poor crows.

Huh? Well, whatever happened next, and whatever Daddy said, let suspense reign, eh, little brother? *wink*

Ah, dear little brother, while you lived and laughed amongst us, you generously sprinkled happiness and joy wherever you went. Your cheery grin embraced friends and family alike. Your compassion and kindness touched all those who knew you. Even the little stray kittens would come rushing to you, for despite coming home tired after a busy day at work, you would always have time to feed them their favourite dish – slices of bread dipped in milk.

God bless you, my darling. You’ve done us proud. You walked the earth with humility and gentleness. Your goodness enveloped all. God blessed us with you, a pure soul, a kindly being who spent fifty-three glorious, memorable years with us. Short they may have been, but my, what magnificence and purity we were blessed with – our precious MKA! Thank You, Lord.

Keep smiling, dearest one!

All my love, hugs and kisses,

Your loving big sis,

Deed xx

Maloquacious © 2017

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It’s not whether we win or lose, but how we play the game

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Oh, yes!

Life has taught me well. It has enriched me. Nourished me. And, on occasions, astounded me. If I were to say: “Life, how dost thou surprise me? Let me count the ways.” Alas. I would not be able to do so, because there are countless ways. It’s as simple as that.

Besides taking me on my best adventure ever, life has shown me that no matter what, there will always, always be ups and downs, highs and lows, crests and troughs. Sunshine. Rain. Sunny days. Stormy days. Indeed, yes. Without a shadow of a doubt. It’s absolute. This ‘turbulence’ is all part of the package and adds to the thrill and zing of life.

The trough toughens us, the crest invigorates us – surely that’s what life is all about….a roller coaster ride. It is rather similar to that of a train journey – stopping at a variety of scenic and non-scenic stations; halting at sights that are desirable to the soul or at panoramas which cause great discomfort to the spirit. All of them toss in that precious bit of ingredient that is so essential to the recipe of life.

Moreover, life would certainly be drab, if there were no challenges to face or no adversities to go through. Their presence in life is what makes an individual strong and disciplined. In fact, it is the hottest fires that forge the hardest steel. As Aristotle put it: “The beauty of the soul shines out when a man bears with composure one heavy mischance after another, not because he does not feel them, but because he is a man of high and heroic temper.”

Adversities are there to test your strength, gauge your perseverance and measure your determination. When you finally overcome trials and tribulations, you feel a fantastic sense of self achievement and self accomplishment. On arriving at the end of the tunnel, you bow your head in gratitude and savour the comforting light. You are more sensitive to others’ feelings and more appreciative to life, in general. For having lived through both the bad times and the good, you can fully enjoy the powerful transformation of the new you. Humility prevails. Compassion reigns. In short, you transform into a better person, more contented.

In addition, these diverse experiences allow you the freedom to react differently to each particular situation. Eventually, through time you become to realise that your response affects your everyday life. For instance, dealing positively to a given situation will result in a positive attitude. A positive attitude, ultimately, puts you in a happy frame of mind. So watch your actions, be aware of your thoughts, and, simply, endeavour to live a life of contentment by taking one day at a time. Moreover, at all times, be grateful.

After all, everyone in this world must endure this ‘up and down’ existence. It all tots up to the thrill and excitement of this fabulous adventure that we call ‘Life’ – the very reason why you and I walk the earth. In other words, we/you are being constantly tested….spiritually, physically and mentally.

How will we fare in this important examination, eh?

Well, that just depends.

It’s not whether we win or lose, but how we play the game.

For my part, I aim to do my best.

And..

What about yourself? What is your game plan?

Pause. Ponder. Reflect.

 

Maloquacious © 2016

I shall pass this way but once

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Courtesy of F.MG

Courtesy of F.MG

 

“I shall pass this way but once; any good that I can do or any kindness I can show to any human being; let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
ETIENNE DE GRELLET

I deeply adore this quote but it makes me sad. It is poignant. I feel a little apprehensive. And I wonder. Wonder about…

..did I really do my best?

..was I truthful in my endeavours?

..was I a genuine friend?

..was I sincere in my intentions?

..did I honestly help the needy?

..was I compassionate to the poor?

..did I play my part in assisting the less fortunate?

..was I a good, caring sibling?

..was I a dutiful daughter, and a devoted mother?

..was I gentle and tolerant towards my old parents?

..did I step softly with humbleness on the earth?

..did I truly shun pride and arrogance?

..was I grateful, with all my heart, for His each and every blessing?

..did I remember Him daily?

..was His remembrance forever etched in my heart, mind, body and soul?

Seconds tick by. I pause to reflect. And I wonder..

…. Did I really do my best? My utmost best?
…. Did I embrace His teachings correctly?

…. But only at the end of my journey, will I come to know.

Therefore..

I beg You, guide me in Your way,

My head is bowed, my eyes flow with tears,

I implore Your help! To You, I earnestly plead!

Empower me with Your love, and eradicate my fears.

Amen.

Maloquacious © 2014