L’affaire d’amour with Monsieur Fromage

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I’m all starry-eyed. Yes, I am. Forget Mr Right, I’ve found Mr Cheese aka Monsieur Fromage. I’ve discovered new horizons that tickle my fancy and stir up my soul. Yes, if cheese be the food of love, play on, maestro

I love Cheese. Aye, the Cheese that is the very essence of cholesterol. But shush, not a word to dear doc. I’m definitely not sharing my happy news with him…as yet. If ignorance is bliss, ’tis folly to be wise (or dead). Okay. I promise to stay within limitations. But, as they say, joy knows no bounds.

And, so—as Sandie Shaw rightly serenaded, ‘Love is just like a merry-go-round‘—I shall remain, as long as I can, head over heels, and completely intoxicated.

Many handsome cheeses have warmed my heart, ’tis true, tempted my spirit, whilst some, alas, beguiled my trusting soul. Therefore, I shall name, but just a few.

Edam

A small Edam cheese and a cheese-slicer.

Image via Wikipedia

Too aged, rather yellowish in complexion. A good traveller, but slightly nutty and salty. Quite sharp and firm, therefore, a wee bit unfriendly. Always wore a coat of red, day and night, night and day…most irritating. Good bye, Edam.

Gouda

Gouda Slice

Image by Marcus Hamaker via Flickr

What a strange orangish complexion? Apparently, with age does become sweeter, tinged by caramel (now that, I adore). Spoke excellent Dutch. Confessed that a cousin ‘Stinging nettle cheese’, or “Brandnetelkaas” is a gouda that contains stinging nettles. Oh? Ouch. Best to keep away. Afscheid.

Stilton

Stilton Cheese

Image by formalfallacy @ Dublin (Victor) via Flickr

Very English, with impeccable grammar. Oddly enough, wafted a strong smell, and sported a rather strange blue complexion. Had delicate blue veins radiating from the centre…centre of what, I have yet to find out. Always munching at celery and biting into pears…the ‘crunch-crunch’ drove me bonkers/bananas.

Cheddar

A wedge of Unpasteurised West Country Cheddar ...

Image via Wikipedia

Aye, sharp and firm. Depending on the day and mood, wore a yellow to off-white complexion. Quite a popular figure; originating from the English village of Cheddar (the namesake) in Somerset, South West England. Professed to live in a cave in Cheddar Gorge. Hence, the antiquated mannerisms. Fare thee well.

Mozarella

Mozzarella cheese

Image via Wikipedia

Sigh. With a name like ‘Mozarella di bufalo‘, one would have pictured a bronzed Mediterranean figure basking lazily in the warm sunshine. But, no…had a white complexion with a humungous appetite for pizza, pasta and lasagne. Waistline? Don’t even go there.

Wensleydale

Wensleydale cheese

Image via Wikipedia

With so many different traits, it was difficult to distinguish the real Wenslydale. At times, Blue Wensleydale was predominant, while on other days Mature Wensleydale appeared, leaving Oak Smoked Wensleydale and Yorkshire Wensleydale to take over on odd days. Mind-boggling, is it not?

Marscapone

Fruit Toast, Marscapone, Summer Berries - Dr J...

Image by avlxyz via Flickr

Si, another Italiano. Came from southwest of Milan, adorned a creamy, milky white complexion. Amiable, but shamelessly overfriendly with summer fruits and Tiramisu. Roving eyes. So, we parted ways. Arrivederci.

Brie

Brazos Valley Brie Cheese

Image by artizone via Flickr

Oui, from France. Soft, and pale in colour. Delightful, with delectable taste. Cousin Camembert is a welcome companion on special occasions. Yes, I’m staying with Brie, my Monsieur Fromage. Besides, we speak the same language…French. C’est la vie, mon ami!

© Maloquacious, 2011.
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15 responses »

  1. I LOVE cheese. I would marry it. I want to sleep with it under my pillow and whisper sweet nothings while I gaze at it longingly in the moonlight. Ok, maybe that’s a bit much but man I love it. All of it. Melted, cold, on a cracker or crisped around the rim of an onion soup crock.

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  2. Yep, that’s me – a cheesaholic to the core. (Not sure whose core, mine or the cheese.) I’d suggest Brie, Camembert, Blue Brie (it has another name, I’ve forgotten it), and there are some Welsh cheeses that are to die for in particular one with mustard seed and ale called Y Fenni (pronounced ‘uh venny’) and a somerset goat’s cheese, that matures and melts and is delicious…

    Given the choice of no chocolate for life or no cheese for life, I’d have to say I can’t give up cheese.

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    • Hi, Val, thanks for reading and I’m so happy to hear that you too, love cheese…Brie’s my fave, although Camembert’s a strong contender! Must try the Welsh cheeses…

      Cheese over chocolate? Yep, I’m with you on that one! 😀

      Like

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